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Kav's got the gift, gonna stick it in the goal, it's time to move your body
I’ve seen enough. We’re gonna win the league. If you made it to the pub last Saturday morning for pre-match pints, I salute your courage, your strength, your indefatigability. I did no such thing. We were meeting our mates for tea that evening and there was no way I was going to be awake for wine and tapas at 6pm if I started drinking at 11am. I’m too old now and too much of a lightweight, and I am OK with that. It’s just as well I didn’t fancy a drink in the ground, as queue
Arlene Finnigan
16 hours ago5 min read


Oh won't you please take me home?
Meh. It was only a pre-season friendly. It must have been, right? It can’t have been a League Cup game. Not on a Saturday. No, it was a decent pre-season run out against a Championship team who’ve spent big. Onwards and upwards. It did make me laugh how many people went on and on before the game about what a dump Stoke is. Good job we’re all from the Vienna of the North, eh? Everywhere is a shithole and everywhere is brilliant. There are bits of Paris that are fucking horribl
Arlene Finnigan
Aug 154 min read


Take me down to P̶a̶r̶a̶d̶i̶s̶e̶ Stoke City
HAPPY NEW SEASON! A time for unbridled, baseless optimism, and for bitching about what colour the cuffs should be on the new home kit. Hope you’ve all had a lovely summer. It probably would have been a lot more lovely if Tuchel hadn’t completely surrendered our midfield to Argentina in the semi-final, but hey ho. At least our ever-lovable South American friends finally got what was coming to them in the final. Felicitaciones, Espana. It was a very enjoyable World Cup, despite
Arlene Finnigan
Aug 84 min read


We've always thought of you as our brick wall
Ahhhh. What a lovely end that was to what has been, overall, a lovely season. I was a bit surprised to see Hudson in the starting line-up against Accrington, after his horrible-looking injury at Newport. I didn’t think it was worth risking it if there was any danger of him still being concussed, but he was understandably desperate to try to get the clean sheet record, the medical team must have cleared him, and Mellon was happy to give him the chance. Disappointed that Fondop
Arlene Finnigan
May 96 min read


I'm a ribbon in the heat now, Newport
Sigh. Last weekend certainly wasn’t dull, was it? Well done to everyone who went to Newport in hard hats (or branded yellow caps paid for by the club if you’re one of the Ringfence Blues on the booze bus). Much to my annoyance, Andy settled a week-long argument on the train down and proved that he suggested going to the last away day of the season as Bunkabin Man on Twitter two days before I did. I couldn’t fault the Welsh hospitality. I asked for a large rosé in the Pen and
Arlene Finnigan
May 27 min read


Dirty old team
Fuck’s sake. That was a bit shite, wasn’t it? I was in bed feeling under the weather and debating whether or not to go to the game at 2pm last Saturday. I did eventually drag myself to the Rocky, but I didn’t go the pub, and apparently I missed out on Salford’s fans singing ‘Oldham’s a shithole’ on the Clayton. Ewan MacColl famously wrote a song about Salford being the Paris of the fucking North, of course. The guest of honour was Hartley, the Dr Kershaw’s mascot, as there wa
Arlene Finnigan
Apr 255 min read


I'm just your long time curse
Sigh. Sorry. This is all my fault. When writing last week’s blog, I had a horrible feeling that saying “the manager of the month curse isn’t real” would come back to bite me on the arse. Sadly, that proved to be the case. Shrewsbury itself is lovely. We went to the Market Hall before the game and had a couple of drinks and a very good cheeseboard at PetitGlou Wine Bar. We do away days in style. I hoped that the owl mural on the wall would prove to be a good omen. We also had
Arlene Finnigan
Apr 187 min read


Easter here again, a time for the blind to see
Well, what a lovely long weekend that was. Still not getting carried away? If you made the trek to Colchester on Good Friday, well done, I’m glad you got the result your journey deserved. If, possibly, not quite the performance. I am once again asking: what the fuck was that mascot? Why, when I google ‘Colchester mascot’, am I being shown pictures of heavy machinery? Chaddy could deffo take him. Chaddy probably wouldn't know what to do with this. I certainly don't. Frank woul
Arlene Finnigan
Apr 117 min read


Knowing us, knowing Crewe, there was nothing we could do
Ah well, we had to lose some time, it’s not the end of the world. It was a kick in the minge, though, wasn’t it? We had good reason to be optimistic that we’d continue our winning run at Crewe. The starting line-up was unchanged, and Kavanagh was back on the bench. Woods has a shot deflected over early on; Daniels nearly got on the end of the resulting corner at the near post. Fondop nearly nicked in after a mix up between Connolly and the keeper, Lawlor. Sutton played a good
Arlene Finnigan
Apr 37 min read


Drummond and Payne, sunshine and rain
No. No. I’m still not looking at hotels. You are. You don’t need to book a hotel in London if we go up automatically. I’m trying to not get carried away. Honestly, I’m trying. But they’re making it very hard. Firstly, all our love to fellow blogger Andrea Heslop, who recently lost her dad. She wrote beautifully last weekend about how being at Boundary Park helped lift her after the hardest week of her life. The whole Latics family is with you, Andrea. Last Saturday had the p
Arlene Finnigan
Mar 287 min read


He'd service the community, but he already has, you see
EIEIEIO….. no. NO. Stop it. Don’t say it. Don’t google the date. Don’t look at hotels. Micky Mellon has told you to not get carried away. Hard not to, though, isn’t it? It was a glorious sunny day last Saturday, apart from the three minutes immediately after we left the house when it chucked it down with rain and hailstones and we got fucking soaked. Thankfully it had dried up by the time we got to the pub, which is just as well as it was heaving with Grimsby fans, and we had
Arlene Finnigan
Mar 216 min read


Tequila, it makes me happy
Ba-da-da-da-da-da-da – TEQUILA! We’ve had some great days out at Prenton Park over the years. The FA Cup victory last season. Dale Stephens scoring twice in Paul Dickov’s first game in charge. Craig Davies’ stoppage time winner in 2007. We’ve had some awful visits there, too. The post-relegation ‘party’. The 4-0 hammering in 2005, when Ronnie Moore said we made them “look like Real Madrid” and “defended like a pub team”. Last Saturday was very much in the former category. Whe
Arlene Finnigan
Mar 145 min read


Hey Stevens, boy, you might have me believing
Unbeaten in five games, four clean sheets in a row. Mellonball’s not so bad after all. One improvement on last season is that we generally comfortably beat the struggling teams. Remember losing at home to Maidenhead? Drawing with Fylde and Dagenham & Redbridge? Those days are behind us. So we were quite right to expect a win at home to Crawley, who were on a bad run of form that left them just above the relegation places. The cryptobro experiment hasn’t worked out well for th
Arlene Finnigan
Mar 76 min read


Bad Gills, talking 'bout the sad Gills
Gillingham away is an absolute slog to get to. It very much wasn’t one of the fixtures I looked out for when they were released. If you made the journey to Priestfield last Saturday, you very much earned and deserved the performance you were treated to. You don’t change a winning team, but I don’t think there’ll have been too many complaints about Woods coming in for Payne. We’ve been wanting the team to be more attacking and start games on the front foot, and while it would
Arlene Finnigan
Feb 284 min read


The Drummond boy from Toxteth went crash, boom, bang
Well that was better than getting battered 3-0, wasn’t it? Yes. Four points from two games is definitely better than getting battered 3-0 twice. There was only one change to the starting line-up for the Fleetwood game, with Garner coming in for Fondop (which I was pleased about, because I could see Garner working well with Kavanagh, like he did with Mellon jnr). Which meant we were sticking with 3-5-2/5-3-2, which didn’t work at Swindon, and I’m not sure why we thought it wou
Arlene Finnigan
Feb 217 min read


Can't go back to London, can't go back to Swindon
Ugh. We really are shite at lunchtime kick-offs, aren’t we? We had, to be fair, been shite in the match that kicked off at 3pm the previous week, and Mellon made four changes to the starting line-up. New boy Calum Kavanagh went straight into the first XI in place of the injured Garner, and Fondop. Simeu and Taylor came in for Drummond, Taylor and Stevens, with the formation switching to – in theory – 3-5-2. Well, it was worth a go, wasn’t it. Alas, we were under pressure pret
Arlene Finnigan
Feb 144 min read


U's stole the sun from my heart
ARRRRRRRGH WHAT IN THE NAME OF FUCK WAS THAT? It’s hard to remember, or to believe it, now, but I swear, we were honestly the better team in the first half v Cambridge Utd. We’re the only team to have won at their ground in the League this season, and we looked like we were going to have a good go at doing the double over them. Both teams had chances without really looking like scoring, but I thought we had the better of it. Payne had a shot go wide after good work down the r
Arlene Finnigan
Feb 75 min read


Y'all been warned about them killa Bees on the swarm
Ugh. Lunchtime kick offs are shit. I guess they’re even shitter if you got up in the middle of the night in order to be in north London for midday. Thoughts and prayers with you poor bastards. And it all started so well at the Hive, didn’t it? We started on the front foot, as we’ve been wanting the players to do all season, and had a decent chance in the first minute, when Pett played a good ball into the box and Garner went down, but the referee was having none of it. Bizarr
Arlene Finnigan
Jan 315 min read


Archives of Payne
January 24th today, and we’re still unbeaten in 2026. January 2026 kicks January 2025’s arse! Come on, let’s take our wins where we can. Before last Saturday’s game, the club paid tribute to former colleague, Dale Harris, who tragically passed away on January 12th. Dale served the club as a matchday volunteer, a coach and education officer with the Community Trust, and as Head of Commercial during our promotion season, before moving on to become the commercial manager at Chad
Arlene Finnigan
Jan 244 min read


There's a Drummond noise inside my head that starts when you're around
After a hectic festive period, welcome to the bleak midwinter. “Thought we had a million-pound pitch? We shouldn’t be having matches postponed for a bit of frost! Fucking tinpot!”. It’s been -8C overnight this week, it’s barely been above freezing, and people were being told not to travel because of Storm Goretti on Thursday. Sometimes you have to do the sensible thing rather than the mad bastard just-soldier-on-my-mum-didn’t-fight-at-D-Day-for-this thing. We can’t say we did
Arlene Finnigan
Jan 105 min read
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